Saturday, March 10, 2018

Today and always...

Last night my dad called me, I know why he called. He called because he knows I will listen and I care. His best friend and his cousin, John is dying of cancer.

John has been a stable and constant part of my life. He knows and has seen my hurts and damage done by my mom and my sister. He promised me to take care of things with them if something every happened with my dad. He was suppose to be my protector. But most of all he was my validation that things were as I thought they were.

Now he is dying.

I've lost a lot of people in the last year. Cancer is awful. I hate it.

This one is rough to go through.

My dad cried last night. That was hard to hear. I'm glad he feels comfortable enough to come to me, but it doesn't make the situation any easier.

I want so badly to craw up in the lap of God and rest from this life. But until I'm able to do it I will put my shoes on and conquer this day, minute by minute, situation by situation.

God is my glory. Today. And always.

Much love, me.