Friday, May 9, 2014

mother's day, i wish it wasn't a holiday

This Sunday is Mother's Day.

This is my most disliked holiday.

It holds terrible memories that I want to forget but were all tied to this day.

When I was married, my then husband, made my last mother's day as his wife the most miserable day of my life. I always say it was on Memorial Day when I felt peace and told him I was divorcing him, but God delivered the final blow to make me sure that it was ok on Mother's Day.

While that has been several years ago the after effects still sting.

Nothing like hearing your then husband on the phone with his girlfriend wishing her a happy mother's day, and totally ignoring you the mother of his children. Then getting the blame for your failing marriage by his mother.

I was granted peace by God to divorce him, and God stepped in in a major way filling every want/desire/need that the kids and I have had since that day. I'm blessed beyond anything imaginable, but I just don't care for this holiday.

I also think as a single mom that this is just a day when society expects us to be honored, but for us who have children are so young it's us that has to fully honor ourselves. Does that make sense?

I asked my girlfriend Jen who also has walked the same journey as I, if she was going to be honored on Sunday with a grand breakfast in bed and all the fixin's. Her reply, "uh not unless someone leaves a pop tart in my bed from the night before." I truly laughed out loud!

So for all the families that honor their momma's enjoy this day. Celebrate & love her.

But for me, I'd rather do nothing and forget it had any meaning.

Much love,